Soberly Seeking Substance as Status Steers Seattle's Newest Social Club
Disclaimer: Everything below is a mix of what I observed and heard during the event. The goal isn’t to pinpoint "who exactly said what," but to share (usually) an outsider's view and overall perspective on these industries. I’m not here to act as a definitive firsthand source—readers should do their own research. I hope this inspires you to attend events, explore new industries, and hear what leaders are presenting. These notes combine my observations with thoughts on how things could run smoother and how ideas connect (IMO). I’m not an expert, you know? Just hanging out in the room with them. Enjoy.
Ratings: Venue: 4/5, Food: 3/5, Speaker Content: 3/5, Networking: 4/5, Likeliness to Return: 5/5
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Ratings: Venue: 4/5, Food: 3/5, Speaker Content: 3/5, Networking: 4/5, Likeliness to Return: 5/5 〰️
This is a series of events I’ve been graciously invited to. Even “part 2,” I’m getting a free ticket to a multi-hundred-dollar ticketed event. The vibes have been more-than-kind from the host. I feel like he’s so sincere and wonderful, so I want to return the compliment with appreciation and gratitude. That being said, I am also constantly critical of everything I interact with. Because I’m outrageously allergic to inauthenticity and performance.
Why Attend: I’m 100% trying to be a billionaire, myself. I’m working hard to build epic companies that positively impact generations. I’m so interested in finance, media, entertainment… massive systems and global thinking. So, when I got invited to this event, I was excited to attend. This is the first of two of their events I’m attending this week - and it was at a new location. The goal was simply to “socialize,”… which I tend to both lean into and stray away from.
Photo Collage and Commentary:
Notes from the Event:
Pre-arrival:
“From what I can tell, the group’s main goal is to create beautiful, curated networking experiences - which is different from what I personally wish existed: a space obsessed with advocacy and systems-change. Advocacy, being brave, questioning norms, focusing on the future of generations to come, pushing back against financial systems, or questioning our world in an explicit way.
Admittedly, it’s sometimes frustrating to me that people with money don’t stop what they’re doing and change systems. The systems they worked hard to break out of (through wealth) – why not stop and fight to change things?
Instead of compliance, feeding off of it more, till they get older, then give back through random charities, which may or may not have ethical integrity behind closed doors.
I don’t know everyone’s behind-the-scenes work or philanthropy, of course; I’m just naming the pattern I see over and over in many elite spaces.
What I see here, instead, is a group with great taste in fashion, following a dress code, hanging out in top-tier venues, working to build a high-net-worth network, and socializing. I grew up in this kind of world. I have been that vibe for much of my life, and I get a bit exhausted by it. Still, it’s all just a bunch of humans with big hearts – I like to think that about any group of people – and we have more in common than not. So the fact that I’ve been graciously welcomed into the community and extended opportunities to network and join makes me want to try harder to crack this code.
Though I’m so sick of meeting new people at networking-focused events (only because so often, the conversation is along the lines of, “What do you do for work?”), which I’m just bored of talking about, because often people get overwhelmed by my answer and then move on. Yet the more you go out, the more you start to meet people and become familiar with them. This isn’t that big of a city. Even the founder himself said at this event, “When you keep showing up, that’s how you make relationships.” That’s what I want to do.
Arriving to the Event:
When I got there, I was a bit excited since I’ve seen this place many times and ALMOST went there last year, but my plans fell through. I just love going to a new venue in the city. It’s exciting.
There were pride flags all over the place and a small welcoming team. The host gave me a hug and a hello, then welcomed me to join the crowd at the end of the lobby/hallway. There was a table with a tiered tray of rainbow colored macaroons, even more pride flags, trans-supporting flags, and then some fruits, crackers, and cheeses. There was a lot of alcohol, too - which I’m not into. Though I do love a non-alcoholic beer. It’s the psych-out mental illusion of drinking for my mind to address that habit, without the madness that alcohol brings upon me.
Lately, I’m still trying out the strategy of ‘existing’ and not forcing conversations. So, usually that means waiting for others to talk to me - or, starting a conversation when it’s completely natural. This meant I went the first 15-20 minutes or so just walking around the venue, checking out the crowd, looking at the decorations, reading the signs, and easing in.
I started to watch a video about the venue that was playing on a loop on one of two TVs, but then a girl came up with a remote and told me she was going to change it to FIFA. I kinda rolled my eyes at that (there were TWO TVs? Only I was there watching that TV, no one was at the other TV lol). Buttever- I don’t need to watch the venue’s commercial anyway.
Next, I went to get myself some more food, and a guy started talking to me. He was in a soccer uniform and said, “So, are you a cheese person?” He was holding a glass of beer and putting cheese onto his plate. I replied, “I’m hungry”. He laughed.
Then he started making more small talk, asking if I like soccer, and I told him I don’t. He said that the world would be a boring place if everyone liked the same things.
But then that sent me on a mental black hole of inner-philosophical debate, wondering if it really would? Or what if everyone liked peace, freedom, creativity, etc… couldn’t that actually be a wonderful thing?
But, I didn’t quite have the energy or pick up on the vibe he’d like to have that conversation. Everything he said to me was agreeable. Not a lot of depth. Safe and short.
Side note: he was short - which made me think of the fact I’d learned on my ride to the venue… less than 4% of men are over 6ft tall.. (Yet SO many women say ‘over 6 ft’ is a requirement for who they’d date… interesting and a bit unrealistic?)
He asked if I was a new member of the club, and I asked him to clarify. He said of the health club (the venue we were in), and I said no, I’m here with this social group. He asked what it stood for? “Young Professional Networking”? I said that I think it’s something like that (I know it’s not exactly that, but close), but then he told me he wasn’t even in the group, but he was stealing their food, so don’t tell anyone. I got a bit annoyed on the host’s behalf, though maybe they didn’t mind. He said that the health club has “thirsty Thursdays” or something (even though it's Tuesday) so that explained to me why they had alcohol in the lobby a bit earlier, so that a bartender was shutting down. I’d asked her if they had any NA beers, but she had said she was closing it down.
Then he asked if I was getting a lot of networking done, and remembered the phrase I’d heard lately along the lines of “You’re not Make-a-wish” and you don’t need to just tell people what they want to hear. So, I kinda ‘went for it’. I told him that I’m absolutely sick of networking and so tired of hearing the question, ‘what do you do for work?’ - how the other day I went to an event, was asked that quetsion what felt like 100 times, then finally ran into someone I knew who wanted to talk about aliens, clones, and alternate history, so then we skipped out on the entire set ofo presentations and just talked about all of that. He laughed and then asked if there was beer inside the networking event. I said I’m not sure, I don’t drink.
Then he said, oh, why not? Health reasons? I replied that I’m an alcoholic and I quit ten years ago. And couldn’t be happier with that decision, then walked away.
A bit later, I saw him watching the FIFA match, and eventually he invited himself into the socializing event for the rest of the night, talking with people. lol. 🙌
Next, I went to go get water, but the dispenser/pitcher had disappeared. A friendly-looking woman was there trying to find water, too, and we instantly hit it off. We started talking about all sorts of things. Even how we are both attending this group’s event on Friday. She asked what I plan to wear, and I said I’m going to break the rules. They suggest we wear soccer-themed outfits, but I want to wear my best dress. My extremely cute pink dress. Then we talked about that dress and how I bought it for a meeting with Paris Hilton. I told her that whole story, and we talked about manifesting your reality. Setting a goal and making it happen.
Then, a group of guys came up to us because one of them recognized me. I like him alright, from what I’ve seen, and he has a fun job title. Turns out he helps with this group too, doing marketing.
They’re attending on Friday as well, and one I hadn’t met before is even running for a political position. I told the future politician that I’m a blogger and would be happy to come to another one of his events in the future and write about it if he’s interested, so we exchanged numbers. I’ll be honest, he’s running as a democrat, which I’m often not in huge agreement with, but I also like the idea of sharing my thoughts with him to see if we can make some big change.
After those guys left, that girl was amazed by me. How all these guys came up to me, laughed, and took my number. But I told her that’s been happening a lot to me lately. How I’ve really been changing my behavior and attitude. We discussed a lot about how she and I are both single moms, and we have different approaches to men. Though, for me, I’m using this mindset with all people, not just men. The act of being patient, existing, the thought of “I’m a flower, not a bee,” and I even told her the “you’re not Make-A-Wish Foundation”. You don’t need to make a guy’s wish come true and tell them what they want to hear if you’re not into it.
She said she’s under the impression that if you like a guy, you need to try even harder to get him, but I said “NO!!!” hahah not me. I don’t try anymore. I am genuine, but I don’t chase at all. I exist and enjoy.
We had a great time talking, and eventually, a fashion designer joined our chat. She has her own fashion line (and of course, we talked about our attire for Friday), and turns out she’s a regular at their events.
Then another girl joined our conversation who works in tech/healthcare. She was fantastic as well.
I started to notice the caliber of women at this event was really nice. Classy, cool, confident, calm, fun. But what about the guys? So far I’d only talked to the soccer/cheese guy, who wasn’t even a part of the group. He was just mooching off the event.
Soon, some speeches started, and the host spoke about how this group has been around for a while, but they’ve recently started the social club aspect of it.
When I looked online, it’s about a hundred dollars a month to join - but then you get to go to their parties for free. (I think) And then you get discounts on other things, too, so it kinda pays for itself depending on your lifestyle.
He also mentioned that it takes a while to keep building relationships, so keep showing up, and you’ll get to know more people over time. I like that.
Next, staff from the venue spoke, and I realized one of the women was the one who turned off the TV I was watching in front of me. So, that made more sense. She was ‘just doing her job’ - though…. idk. Could have waited for me to walk away or been a bit more empathetic. But… beggars can’t be choosers ahhaha.
Plus, later, I asked her to get more plates when they’d run out, and she was friendly about that. So, she won my heart back again.
I left part of the way during the speeches to use the restroom, etc. I just don’t like standing still, and the speech on the venue was basically a commercial for something I don’t need/live by. Maybe when/if I move downtown.
Next, it was back to mingling. I was approached by a guy at the snack table who was nice to talk to. We played a game where you say one thing you like, one thing you don’t like, and one thing you’re obsessed with. I didn’t say “GameStop” for the third one 😂, but I should have :)
Then I was later approached by a guy whom I didn’t recognize at first, but then instantly remembered because he tried to get me to join his scammy MLM four years ago. He was selling it like how you make money and get to go on trips on big boats and stuff. (But i’m like - uugh boats are so boring). And somehow he remembered me??? Even though I hadn’t seen him in 4 years? Couldn’t believe it.
He and I had met on an app for making business partners/whatever. Liek “bumble business”. At first, I was happy to connect with him. I even studied like 90% of what I needed to become a certified financial advisor… but then things just started to feel off so I dropped it.
Plus, so much of what he was advertising and pushing about joining his MLM was like “going to cool parties, and all you can drink cruises,” which doesn’t appeal to me.
AND at one point when I was filling out paperwork, he asked me for my SSN so HE COULD TYPE IT IN???? And I said, uh. How about I type it in myself.
Honestly… I wasn’t too happy to talk to him again… but I think he may have joined this group as a member. I mean, he’s completely focused on making money - like as his career, selling life insurance. So of course he’s bought into an expensive social club and then try ot get everybody else to join his MLM. Uugh.
Luckily, a girl came up and interrupted him and me from talking. She rushed up to me and said, “Kelly! How did you sleep?” and I said, " Huh? When. And she said any night!
This girl I like a lot, by the way. Superficial reasons? She has amazing hair, adorable freckles, and nice vibes. Also, she likes to dance and is a professional woman.
Turns out a week or two ago, when I met her, I’d seen her two days in a row, and the second day I asked her, after saying hey to her, how she’d slept. Just cause she was working super hard that night before, and I was wondering if she got any sleep.
She said she’d been thinking about the fact that I asked her that question all day and thought it was so interesting that I break norms like that, with such surprising questions.
And then she’d seen me all night and was so excited to come up to me and ask how I’d slept… but I’d always been in conversation with other people, till then.
That surprised me because I had literally been talking to that MLM guy, but I even told her I was glad she interrupted us and freed me from that convo.
I was kinda shocked, cause I think I just always ask random questions. I’d even admitted to her I thought I’d annoyed the crap out of her cause I asked her like 8 times to join me dancing on Thursday nights and/or once Dancing ‘Til Dusk starts and she’d said she can’t. LOL. But she said no way!! She just can’t join cause she is hosting too many events. LOL.
I was also surprised she remembered me so fondly. I’m just starting to get used to that in general. I’m not sure what it is lately, but I feel like more and more people are starting to recognize me. Say hey, be happy to see you. It’s not something I’m as used to… I got used to that in Shanghai when I’d made good friends in the acting community, but now this, random acquaintances where I’ve left a positive/fond impression, even when I’m 100% myself, it’s kinda pleasantly surprising.
Beyond that, I talked to a few more people that night, then we were told it was time to leave this venue, but there was a reservation for a rooftop venue.
Actually, it’s the venue we’ll be at later this week. So I’m glad to know I’ll need to pack with warm-clothes… it gets chilly there. (I gave that suggestion to the event host, too, but let’s see if he reminds people or not)
I only stayed for a minute or so (cause I was invited to join, personally… which was sweet) but it was super chilly on the rooftop and I had a guitar jam to get to.
I only spoke to one more person for a bit while up on the roof, but they just said they were a real estate agent, and then kinda got bored with our convo. Though I was also a bit bored. He was nice, but not that “wow factor” off the bat.
All in all… it was fun… but still I’m not sure the point of hte group exactly. Like, beyond the surface. I am glad I’ll get to attend another one of their events, and let’s see how it is.
I so badly want to build community, substance, relationships, etc. I want to have a fun network, but not with the goal of business deals, etc. I just want to keep meeting people who make me smile, laugh, and happy. With common goals, understanding of my bravery. My insane, unwavering passion and conviction for creating the change in the world I want to see. For being brave, fighting norms, demanding authenticity, and inspiring others.
So, if this group wants to keep welcoming me around, I’m happy to join. But I don’t want to change who I am to fit in. You know?
- so, still trying to figure out if I fit.
And with that, see you in part 2 :)
Until next time, I wish you the motivation and success to search for opportunities around your area. Search and explore: Who is out there giving talks? There are new things happening all of the time.
Find relatable or interesting topics you like and check them out! Maybe even something hosted at a cool venue, if there’s no other reason to go. Let’s see what you can learn and discover not too far from home. 😊
